Archive for the 'Kim Kardashian' Category

Well, Damnit, That’s Just Cheating

by in Monday, June 18th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Pussycat Dolls

 

nicolescherzinger_orkimk1.jpg

That does it. I quit. I can’t do this anymore. They are cloning hos.It’s hard enough to keep all the tarts straight. Who has a sex tape? Who doesn’t? Who’s famous for being famous? Who actually DOES something like music, acting? 

Now Star tells me this week that Kim Kardashian is going to perform with the Pussycat Dolls. Now, aside from being a pox on humanity, the absolute best fucking thing about PCD is that you don’t have to know who any of them are other than the head ho, Nicole Scherzinger. And the only reason I know who SHE is happens to be because I watched Popstars and remember her cheesy boots and California Cowboy chic from THAT show.

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Maybe She Really Did Get Butt Implants

by in Sunday, June 10th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian
kkb.jpg

Kim Kardashian was spotted showing off with her rumored butt implants. Judging from how she really seems to love attention aimed at that region (even more than usual, that is), I’d say that it’s a definite possibility. She’s a tad on the cheap side either way, though, and I’m distracted by the jeans-leggings that her friend is wearing. How did she even put those on?

kkb1.jpg  kkb2.jpg  kkb3.jpg  kkb4.jpg

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Explain How This is Possible

by in Monday, June 4th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian

kkass1.jpg

Could this be real? I was kind of hoping that Kim Kardashian is wearing padded butt enhancers, because otherwise, this is all rather mind-boggling.

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Kim Scores 1-1 for Dressing Herself

by in Monday, April 16th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian
kim2.jpg   palette-cleanser.jpg

Kim Kardashian may be stunning, but all I can think about is whether or not I could wear those earrings are bracelets. Or necklaces? They’re that darn big. I also hate that shade of orange, which she conveniently matched with her lipstick. The combination of jewelry and shirt color is so gross that you’ll need to cleanse your palette with a photo of Kim at the T-Mobile Sidekick ID launch. Ahhh… much better.

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Forget Florida…

by in Monday, April 9th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian Princess of the Sex Tape

… all the rode hard and put away wet girls retire to Vegas.

Hot on the heels of dethroned Miss Nevada USA Katie Rees, Kim Kardashian has taken her post-sex-tape-release self to Vegas, where club promoters are willing to pay any D-list celebutard to “host” a party to draw a crowd.

Kimmykin’s party was at Tao, and was called a “Princess Party” and Star reports it had all the bad taste Vegas had to offer: Kim, her sisters, a big tiara dropping from the ceiling, and a DJ playing Madonna’s “Material Girl.”

It’s good to know that money doesn’t buy taste. Then again, this is Vegas we are talking about, home of Siegfried and Roy, a show starring Celine Dion and Cirque du Soleil acrobats, and Michael Jackson. Parties hosted by the likes of Kim Kardashian and K-Fed fit right in with the vibe.

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Pot, Meet Kettle, Meet Frying Pan

by in Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Britney Spears
kimsuesex.jpg

Does ANYONE keep a secret in Hollywood anymore?

Via Hollywood Rag, Kim Kardashian doesn’t want to hang out with Paris anymore because Paris’ sex tape sold way more copies than Kim’s is selling she doesn’t do drugs or drink and Paris does. However, her former publicist, Jonathan Jaxon claims he has photos to the contrary.

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It’s Here! What About Half the Readers Have Been Waiting For!

by in Thursday, March 22nd, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Sex Tape
20070321-kim_kardashian_sex_tape_10.jpg

The Kim Kardashian sex tape is finally available for those of you who haven’t seen enough celebrity snatch this past week. Reports from Drunken Stepfather include the size of Ray J (large), Kim’s performance (Paris-like and condom-less).

What’s interesting is that there was PLENTY of time for Kimmy to have gotten herself an injunction to prevent the video’s release and yet it didn’t happen. I’m sure she’s crying into her Hermes bag about it.

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Kim Kardashian Says Sex Burns Calories

by in Tuesday, March 6th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Sex Tape
kim_kardashian_sex_tape_for_sale3.jpg

Okay, well, maybe that’s just my interpretation. But while she’s somehow managed to stall Vivid’s sale of her sex tape, she has started selling a workout tape at her MySpace page. I can only ASSUME that they aren’t one and the same (the sex tape and the workout video) because I just can’t bring myself to visit her MySpace page, but stranger things have happened.
 
You can download it right from the web, too. I’d assume you could have also downloaded the sex tape right from the web as well. I’m going with the theory that she’s hoping people will be confused enough to shell out money for whatever piece of crap the workout tape is thinking it’s the sex tape. I myself will not be purchasing the tape, as I’m afraid that her workout regimen might result in my having to buy all new blouses.

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I’m Not Buying It

by in Thursday, February 22nd, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Sex Tape
paris_hilton_kim_kardashian_fashion.jpg

Access Hollywood reports that Kim Kardashian has filed suit against Vivid over the upcoming sex tape being released starring her and ex-boyfriend Ray J.

I’m not buying the lawsuit for a second. For starters, this is Vivid, one of the biggest porn companies out there. It’s not like it’s some guy selling the videos out of the back or his car; if these folks think they have a legal leg to stand on to distribute the video, I’m betting they know what they are talking about.

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Public Service Announcement for Rich Kids

by in Thursday, February 8th, 2007.
Kim Kardashian, Sex Tape
kimk_05.jpg

Note to children of rich parents:

While you may want to be famous yet have no discernible talent, we here at Juicy Rumors would like to remind you that when breaking up with people, be sure to destroy any and all sex tapes. Do not leave them in the possession of your former lover. Do not leave them in a storage facility where you will forget to pay the bill and have them purchased. And above all, don’t leave them with a lover who will shack up in the future with a crackwhore a singer near bankruptcy Whitney Houston.

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