Archive for the 'Pete Doherty' Category

How Dirty Would You Get for Publicity?

by in Sunday, July 8th, 2007.
Pete Doherty, Jared Leto

Pete Doherty

The model who was alleged to have been the reason Kate Moss kicked Pete Doherty out has come forward to get her 15 minutes.

Lindi Hingston, a 29-year-old model from South Africa, met Doherty in a nightclub and “just had to do it” which I assume means sleep with Doherty. At 29, she must have felt desperate to get famous and figured he was her last real shot?

Doherty has allegedly been calling to see her again, but Hingston says she’s decided to stay with her boyfriend of three years. He must be THRILLED to hear that. Hopefully if he does keep her around, he has her laminated before he agrees to touch her.

As for Hingston, apparently gross and dirty is her type, since she boasts of previous flings with Axl Rose and Jared Leto.

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The UK Just Has a Better Breed of Loser

by in Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007.
Drugs, Pete Doherty, Court

Pete Doherty Late to Court

Pete Doherty never fails to disappoint. While we may have a bargain-basement version of a judge annoyance in Paris Hilton, Pete has made a career out of annoying judges, ignoring terms of probation, and just about anything else he thought he could get away with.

In today’s UK courtroom festivities, good old Pete didn’t disappoint. He showed up so late for his hearing that the judge called his lawyer into court TWICE to explain why his client wasn’t showing up, and finally issued a warrant for his arrest without bail right before Pete wandered in.

My guess is that he wanted to alter his state a little bit before having to face the big scary judge. He evidently decided at that point he was best off just pleading guilty, which he did… guilty of possession of crack, heroin, pot, and ketamine, as well as driving while being Pete Doherty under the influence.

The judge pointed out that him driving a car is pretty much the same as letting a crazy person with a rocket launcher out on the streets, but deferred sentencing until August providing Doherty enter a treatment program by July 16.

Judge? We’ve seen this before. Send his sorry ass to jail. He is NEVER going to clean up. Sheesh. Even Robert Downey, Jr. managed to get straight. There is NO hope for this guy.

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Nevermind the Question About Pete Doherty…

by in Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007.
Paris Hilton, Pete Doherty, Reality, Jack Osbourne

Valtrex

… I have my answer now.

I’d forgotten a news item I’d seen over the weekend, which explains the WHOLE thing.

It turns out that the producers of the “hit” (and I use that term lightly because, really, is anyone still watching?) show The Bachelor had to axe a bunch of potential hotties for the next season because they tested positive for herpes and other STDs.

Apparently all the hot people are now having the herpes, forcing them to have sex only with other, similarly infected hotties or, possibly, utter skeevos like Pete Doherty.

I’m also going to apply this theory to Paris Hilton banging the Fat Jack Osbourne.

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Again with the Dirty, Skanky Men

by in Monday, July 2nd, 2007.
Kate Moss, Pete Doherty

Kate and Pete Dunzo?

First I had to deal with vomit-in-mouth syndrome with the whole Criss Angel business and now Pete Doherty cheats on Kate Moss? Is he SERIOUS? First off, he should thank his lucky stars that he can even GET a model, much less have one close to marrying him.

Even more importantly, however, how utterly whoreific do you have to be to fuck Pete Doherty? I mean, I give Kate a slight pass that he was once actually a musician or something, but my GOD, the whole world knows he’s an unwashed drug addict. What kind of beer goggles do you need to have to go home with THAT? Whoever that girl is? Or the other girls he was photographed with? Girlfriends, you need professional help. Because that is NASTY.

Kate is allegedly broken up about the whole thing (again… nothing a good shrink and some electroshock couldn’t help with) but she is apparently having a SERIOUSLY bad week, what with Agent Provacateur firing her and all.

She needs to get her shit together. Fast.

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If Pete Doherty and Tom Sizemore Had a Baby…

by in Thursday, May 10th, 2007.
Drugs, Pete Doherty

Pete Doherty Stoned Again

HOW did I miss this? My beloved drug-pickled loser Pete Doherty was arrested again! I seriously need to add him to my dead pool because there is no way this man is going to live much longer. He’s been in rehab countless times, and has a freaking IMPLANT to keep him off drugs, and he still finds a way around it.

I seriously have no idea what Kate Moss sees in this mess. I can only assume that when he pulls himself together, he gives the best oral sex EVER because I can’t determine a single redeeming quality he has. He may have been attractive at some point in the long-forgotten past, but now he looks pretty much like any drunk homeless person you can see on a doorstep.

I wonder what happens if they find another implant to try to clean him up? Will he start smoking Drano or something? I once met two guys much like Pete. I went over to their apartment with my boyfriend and these two had a whole collection of pipes they were scraping the resin off to get high. These two would smoke toothpaste, and were the first people I ever knew who thought huffing was a career choice. It’s hard to believe that someone as messed up as those two losers could be famous and dating a supermodel.

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My Childhood Has Been Ruined

by in Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007.
Pete Doherty

There are a TON of viral videos on the YouTube right now.

For starters, Kermit the Frog channels Pete Doherty and shoots up during this video for his cover of Nine Inch Nails “Hurt.” Yes, you did read that right. Hurry up and check it out before the Muppet Mafia sees this one and yanks it as trademark infringement or some such.

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You Say It’s My Birthday?

by in Saturday, March 24th, 2007.
Kate Moss, Pete Doherty
junkie-pete-doherty-buys-syringes-for-unknown-reasons-11x.jpg

Juicy Dirt must apologize for the lack of updates from Thursday. It was my birthday, and you see, like my fellow March 22 Birthday Sharer William Shatner, I may have to blame it on the “Mad Cow.”

At any rate, after partying like it was 1999, I can still say that I can’t party as hard as Pete Doherty.

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Either Way, They Are Losers

by in Saturday, March 3rd, 2007.
Kate Moss, Pete Doherty
moss_doherty_move_in.jpg

I thought that the UK had some sort of Child Protective Services, don’t they? NSPCC or something? Because DAMN someone needs to go in there and get Kate Moss’ kid until the girl wises up and rids herself of that 160 pounds of pickled dead weight named Pete Doherty. 
 
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So Now Pete is Sexy

by in Friday, March 2nd, 2007.
Pete Doherty
1295917.jpg

Apparently Pete was nominated as the Sexiest Man for the NME’s Shockwave Awards. I’m a little confused when I look at this picture. Kate I can understand, of course. She was nominated at the Sexiest Female, but Pete? His nomination seems to miss the mark, what with his constant zombie eyes and staggering. But then again, the Shockwave nominations weren’t exactly the clearest. Pete was also nominated for both Best Dressed Man and Worst Dressed Man, along with Villain of the Year and Hero of the Year. Interesting.

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Oh, Pete, One of These Days You’ll OD…

by in Wednesday, February 28th, 2007.
Drugs, Pete Doherty
91437-doherty.jpg

… but until then, we are stuck with idiotic stories that sound like something a stupid high-school-aged stoner would do.

According to The Sun, Kate Moss’s constant druggie companion decided that walking around the zoo smoking a joint wasn’t quite “hip” enough and tossed his roach to the penguins, who promptly ate it.

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